Tag: animal

Animal Sex Facts From Giraffe Sex to X Rated Panda Porn

XXX rated Animal sex facts including Giraffe love, Snake Mating Ball Orgy, Penis Fencing and Xrated Panda Porn… A VlogBrothers Giraffe Love sex facts Tribute 🙂

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Honey Bee: Exploding Testicles.

A virgin queen that survives to adulthood without being killed by her rivals will take a mating flight with a dozen or so male drones (out of tens of thousands eligible bachelors in the colony). But don’t call these drones lucky because during mating, their genitals explode and snap off inside the queen!

Bonobos 

Bonobos use sex as greetings, a mean of solving disputes, making up for fights, and as a favors in exchange for food. They tongue kiss, engage in oral sex, mutual masturbations, have face-to-face genital sex and even have a strange “penis fencing” ritual!

Red-Sided Garter Snake: An Annual Mating Ball Orgy

he annual mating of red-sided garter snakes is a tourist attraction in Manitoba, Canada. That’s because when a female garter snake emerges from hibernation, she releases a pheromone that attracts hundreds of male snakes in the vicinity to rush her and create a large squirming “mating ball.”

Hyena: The Females Got Balls!

A female hyena has a pseudopenis, basically an enlarged clitoris, that they can erect at will. To mate, the meeker male has to insert his penis into her pseudopenis. That’s difficult for the males, but still nothing compared to the female having to give birth through a penis!

Giraffe Love Sex with… everything!

When a male happens upon a female giraffe, he will perform a procedure known as the “fleshmen sequence” to see if she is in estrus. First, he nudges her rump to induce urination. He then takes a mouthful of urine. If it tastes good to him, then he begins to court her.

Dolphin Penis: That’s Not His Hand.

Here’s something you probably don’t know about Flipper: he has retractable penis. Male dolphins also have a very strong sex drive. It can mate many, many times in a day. Now here’s the bad news: male dolphins aren’t that much of a stud. The average time to ejaculation? 12 seconds.

Percula Clownfish: Your Mommy Was Your Daddy.

Clownfish live in a group consisting of a breeding pair of male and female, as well as some non-breeding males. There is strict hierarchy based on size: the largest is the female, next largest is the male, and then the non-breeding males.

Giant Panda: X-Rated Panda Porn!

For a while, zookeepers had trouble getting pandas raised in captivity to breed. In fact, male and female pandas showed little interest in sex – that is until someone at the Chengdu Giant Panda Breeding and Research Base in Sichuan Province, China, had the bright idea of showing them panda porn!

Now, when pandas reach adulthood, zookeepers there show them steamy videos of panda sex as part of their initiation rites.

Galapagos Giant Tortoise: The Longest Neck Wins.

To determine who gets to mate, male Galapagos giant tortoises will rise on their legs and stretch their necks. The shorter tortoise will cry uncle and leave the taller, larger tortoise to mate.

Garden Snail: Love Darts

Snails’ genitals are on their necks, right behind their eye-stalks. Not weird enough? Read on.

Snails are hermaphrodites, meaning they have both male and female sexual organs, but they do not self-fertilize.

Bedbug: Traumatic Insemination

Here’s chivalry for you: the male bedbugs don’t even bother with the female’s sex organs. Instead, a male bedbug uses its scimitar-like sexual organ to impale the female bedbug’s body and deposit his sperm!

Scientists even have a cute name for this sort of thing: “traumatic insemination.” Ouch!

Porcupine: Wee Marks the Spot.

First of all, female porcupines are interested in sex only about 8 to 12 hours in a year!  Second, to court a female during the short mating season, a male porcupine stands up on his hind legs, waddles up to her, and then sprays her with a huge stream of urine from as far as 6 feet away, and drench his would-be paramour from head to foot!

If she is ready, then she’ll rear up to expose her quill-less underbelly and let the male mount her from the behind (that’s the only safe position for porcupines!). Once mating begins, the female is insatiable: she forces the male to mate many times until he is thoroughly exhausted. If he gets tired too quickly, she will leave him for another male!

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Charlotte The Penguin Afraid Of Water, Taught To Swim!

Penguin is so scared of water she is given swimming lessons – Charlotte the king penguin has to be cajoled into the water by keepers

A baby penguin is so terrified of water she is having swimming lessons.

Zookeepers are desperately trying to help the flightless bird, called Charlotte, conquer her fear.

Head keeper Alistair Keen even donned a snorkel and got in with her to show her how it was done.

But the penguin is so scared that whenever she is carried into the water she tries to take off.

The king penguin hatched at Birdland Park & Gardens in Bourton-on-the-Water, Gloucestershire, and has been hand-reared ever since.

Mr Keen said: “Initially Charlotte was absolutely terrified at the prospect of getting her feathers wet.

“I know penguins can’t fly but she was making a pretty good attempt in her bid to avoid taking the plunge.

“In the wild the chicks only learn to swim by following their parents in to the water so I, as her adopted dad, felt obliged to get in and try to show her how it was done.

“At first it didn’t seem like she was ever going to get the hang of it, she certainly hasn’t taken to it like a duck to water.”

Charlotte was born in September but it was not know that she was a girl untl May.

Keepers have to wait until penguin chicks are around seven months old before sending feathers off for DNA analysis to confirm the sex.

They chose four potential names and then asked members of the public, which had just celebrated the birth of Princess Charlotte, to vote for their favourite.

Birdland is the only place in England to breed king penguins and Charlotte is the first chick successfully reared there in seven years and the first female chick to be born in nine years.

The egg was artificially incubated after several previous eggs had been broken by other penguins and Charlotte was hand-reared by Mr Keen with round-the-clock care.

King penguins are the second largest species of penguin, growing as tall as three feet and weighing up to 2.5 stone.
They are distinguishable by their orange tinted breasts, cheeks and beaks.

In the wild they live off small fish and squid and are native to the islands of northern Antarctica.


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VEDA Day 19 – The One With The Massive Teddy

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VEDA Day 8 – The One With Bert The Ladybird

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VEDA stands for Vlog Every Day in April and is a YouTube Challenge for vloggers to encourage vloggers to Vlog Every Day in April.

With this in mind my Vlog Every Day in April VEDA videos will be about the pictures on my wall.

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Stoned Man Arrested For Blowing A Horse

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Masked Man Wearing Assless Pants Arrested for Alleged Horse Fucking – Stoned Man Arrested For Blowing A Horse

A Wisconsin man was arrested in Wausau last week for alleged horse fucking after sheriff’s deputies found him in a barn with a jar of vaseline. Jared Kreft, 30, was reportedly wearing “a face mask, black jacket and blue wind pants with holes cut in the groin and buttocks areas,” and later admitted to performing oral sex on the horse.

From the Daily Herald:

He told deputies after he was arrested that he went to the barn and performed oral sex on the horse and tried to arouse the horse with his hand, according to court documents. He said he had viewed “horse pornography” before the incident.

Deputies also found a blue and red glass pipe often used for smoking marijuana and a jar of petroleum jelly.

When they searched his apartment in the city of Wausau, a detective found a small amount of marijuana, according to court documents.

Kreft was charged with possession of drug paraphernalia, sexual gratification with an animal sex organ, possession of marijuana as a repeat offender, and bail jumping. He’s being held on $2,000 bond and has been ordered to stay away from the barn where his alleged crimes took place.

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Hardcore Dominatrix wants planning permission for XXX BDSM Fetish Bondage Sex Dungeon

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‘Sensual sadist’ dominatrix applying for planning permission for her fetish club promises to close on Sundays – Dominatrix Applies For XXX BDSM Fetish Bondage Sex Dungeon Permission

First video –

A dominatrix describing herself as a ‘sensual sadist’ is being forced to tackle the very unsexy task of getting planning permission for her fetish club – which she promises she’ll close on Sundays and Bank Holidays.

Lorraine White – AKA ‘Princess Lucina’ – who beats, restrains and humiliates men for their pleasure, was discovered to be running the fetish club without the right permission when the fire service was called to an industrial estate in 2012 and was unable to get inside the premises.

And Ms White, who describes herself as a ‘sensual sadist offering every BDSM fantasy from the mild to the wild’, is now submitting an application to Stockport Council asking for a change of use for her unit on the industrial estate from ‘Warehouse’ to ‘Place of photography and mild fetish play’.

‘I don’t care as long as everyone is consenting,’ Jason Morris, 44, who lives near the building, told the Manchester Evening News.

‘I wouldn’t have known it was there but for press coverage. As long as it stays that way I’m not bothered.’

Jacqui Wood, who is based in the same building, said: ‘If it’s legal and the landlord is OKAY with it then that’s their business.’

If the application is approved, Ms White will be allowed to keep her club open from Tuesday to Saturday, from 11pm to 7am, but she has promised to close the premises on Sundays and Bank Holidays.

She was fined £5,000 with £3,000 costs for breaching fire regulations earlier this year.

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Anaconda Eats Man Alive! Man Vs Snake!

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Man eaten alive by snake defending himself against hundreds of animal abuse claims – Man Eaten Alive By Anaconda Snake On Discovery Channel –

An explorer and wildlife expert who was eaten alive and regurgitated by an anaconda has defended his actions after facing hundreds of claims of animal cruelty.

Paul Rosolie donned a specially-made ‘snake-proof’ suit and covered himself in pig’s blood for his extraordinary stunt, which is due to be aired on the programme ‘Eaten Alive’ next month on the Discovery Channel.

But the wildlife expert has been branded a snake-baiting opportunist by some corners, with more than 40,000 signatories on a Change.org petition demanding the show is never aired and animal rights group PETA calling Rosolie a ‘fool’.

‘This is animal abuse to the highest degree and absolutely disgusting, and could kill the snake – an adult green anaconda cannot fit the width of an adult man’s shoulders into it’s body,’ the petition reads.

‘The show promotions even show the host holding an anaconda by the head as if he’s about to be attacked. That’s perpetuating stereotypes that condition people to fear these animals. Humans are not their natural prey!’

The wildlife expert donned a ‘snake-proof’ suit for the stunt

n an interview with Entertainment Weekly, Rosolie defended the stunt, saying that people were cared about animals but not their living space and he wanted to ‘force a dialogue’ on the issue of habitat destruction.

Nothing else that I could have done would have gotten more attention than this,’ he said.

Eaten Alive will air on the Discovery Channel UK on 12 December

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Words You Should Never Use On The Internet

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Words You Should Never Use On The Internet

It was my Birthday last week so very kindly my friend’s TookItHomeToJenny and the MoveClubStrikesBack Team made me a little bible of swear words to learn and use as I am such an innocent soul.

Jenny – www.youtube.com/tookithometojenny
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Original Video – Pretty Ladies Send Me Spunk and Teach Me Swear Words –

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Student Sheep Shagging For Exam Stress Relief | Animal Sex Stress Relief

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Student who ‘had sex with sheep’ was ‘stressed about exams’

A university student who is alleged to have had sex with a sheep told police he was stressed out about a midterm exam.

The 23-year-old is alleged to have been found having sex with a ewe by a fellow Fresno State University student who heard bizarre noises coming from a barn on campus.

And the unidentified student, who was arrested and charged with sexual assault of an animal, told police that he was stressed about an upcoming exam and had been drinking, according to ABC7.

‘It’s just kind of disgusting and revolting and personally makes me angry. I mean, why would you do that?’ said Marisa Burkdoll, a student who works with animals on campus.

‘It’s just kind of sick. It’s unnatural and the animals they can’t really, I mean they can’t defend themselves. They can to an extent but they’re innocent, you know what I mean?’

The sheep – one of many used for breeding at the school – is being treated by vets.

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FREE Lifetime Supply Of Bacon for SEX? #FoodPorn

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‘Lifetime supply of bacon’ advertised on Gumtree… mmmm bacon

A lot of interesting things are advertised on Gumtree – from an entire flat of furniture to in-home yoga lessons.

However, this person has listed a product priceless in the eyes of many a meat eater.

They have offered a lifetime supply of bacon. The seller claims it’s free. But nothing in this world is ever free.

Here is the full description from the Hampshire-based vendor of pork:

‘I have a lifetime supply of bacon, I’m desperate to get rid because I need to shed a few piggies.

‘I know it says it’s free however I would like something in return. 😉 (The wink gives it away).’

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Man Dives Into Poo To Save Trapped Puppies

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Man Dives Into Poo To Save Trapped Puppies – Guy crawls through poo tunnel to rescue puppies

The Hero comes in many forms. Today he is semi-clad and covered in poo.

Watch this guy crawl through a tunnel of human faeces to rescue four puppies in Thailand.

He ignores the ridicule from his mates and slides belly-down into a tube spewing excrement.

The young pooches can be heard whining as as they’re pulled free from the stinking cesspool.

What a hero.

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Burglar Arrested After Raping Teddy Bear | Furry Teddy Bear Sex?

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Desperate burglar who had sex with TEDDY BEAR during raid is caught after DNA match

Paul Mountain, who violated the toy and was caught when his semen was found, said he felt an ‘overwhelming need’ for sexual relief

A randy burglar was caught after he had sex with a teddy bear while raiding a shed – and police discovered his DNA inside the toy.

Paul Mountain, 38, said he was coming down from amphetamines and felt an ‘overwhelming need’ for sexual relief, the Lancashire Telegraph reports.

It is believed he cut a hole inside the defenceless bear before getting down to business.

Blackburn Magistrates Court heard that the owner of an allotment found a shed had been broken into and the contents were spread all around.

On the floor among the wreckage she found the teddy bear – used and abused.

Prosecutor, Domenic Howells said: “The teddy bear was passed to the police and semen found inside came back to this defendant.

“He told officers he was coming down off amphetamine and felt overwhelming need for sexual relief.”

The warped crook, of Darwen, Lancs, pleaded guilty to burglary with intent to steal and was bailed for the preparation of a pre-sentence report.

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Backpacker’s 3 Inch Long NOSE LEECH

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Backpacker brings back three-inch LEECH from travels in Vietnam – up her nose

Daniela Liverani carried the bloodsucker – which was as long as her finger and as thick as her thumb – in her nostril for a month before doctors removed it

A British backpacker brought an unwanted souvenir home from her travels in Vietnam – in the form of a slimy three-inch leech wedged up her nose.

Daniela Liverani was travelling around south-east Asia when she started suffering persistent nosebleeds.

The 24-year-old assumed it was nothing more than a burst blood vessel.

Days later, after she returned home to Edinburgh, she spotted something poking out from her right nostril and thought it was just a blood clot.

But last week, she was rushed into A&E at Edinburgh’s Royal Infirmary after discovering a leech had been living in her nose for a month.

Daniela, originally from Glasgow, said: “About two weeks before I came home from Asia, I started having nosebleeds.

“I’d fallen off a motorbike just before they started so at first I thought I must have burst a blood vessel.

“After I got home, the nosebleeds stopped and I started seeing something sticking out of my nostril. I just thought it was congealed blood from the nosebleeds.”

Even when the leech started to make its way out of her nose, bartender Daniela still thought it was a blood clot, reports the Daily Record.

She said: “I saw him so many times but I just sniffed him back up.

“I tried to blow him out and grab him but I couldn’t get a grip of him before he retreated back up my nose.

“When I was in the shower, he would come right out as far as my bottom lip and I could see him sticking out the bottom of my nose.

“So when that happened, I jumped out of the shower to look really closely in the mirror and I saw ridges on him. That’s when I realised he was an animal.

“My friend Jenny and I called NHS 24 and were told to get to accident and emergency as soon as possible.”

Daniela was whisked into a treatment room where a nurse and doctor examined her nose using a torch, forceps and tweezers.

She said: “The staff were horrified. The doctor used a nose forceps to prise my nostrils open really wide – it was agony.

“The nurse and Jenny pinned me down to the bed. Whenever the doctor grabbed him, I could feel tugging at the inside of my nose.

“Then all of a sudden, after half an hour, the pain stopped and the doctor had the leech in the tweezers.

“He was about as long as my forefinger but as fat as my thumb.

“He could move so fast as well, which freaked me out. I’ve no idea how he got up there but he’d have got bigger and bigger from feeding on my blood.

“He had been curled up in a big ball, using my nostril as a little nest, so Jenny and I called him Mr Curly. At one point, I could feel him up at my eyebrow.

“I asked the doctor what would’ve happened if I hadn’t gone to hospital and she said he’d probably have worked his way into my brain.”

Mark Siddal, curator at the American Museum of Natural History in New York and an expert on leeches said: “Daniela could have picked up this leech from water in Vietnam, if she had been swimming.

“Or it could have gone in through her mouth, as she was drinking water.

“Even though it was there for around a month, these leeches don’t grow all that quickly, so it wouldn’t have been much smaller when it went up there. It would have been quite sizeable.

“It’s interesting that people don’t feel these leeches go up their nose.”

Daniela isn’t the first person to have a creepy crawly removed from an orifice.

Watch a brave medic pull a giant insect from a man’s ear in India in the clip below.

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Cow Gets Stuck On Roof in Switzerland

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Apparently tired of spending her days grazing the same grassy field, this cow decided to go in search of some pastures new.

But the bold bovine may have regretted her little adventure after becoming stuck on a roof in the ‘gateway to the Swiss Alps’.

Stunned cyclist Rolf Steiner spotted the adventurous animal chilling out on the slippery slate roof of a farmhouse near the capital Bern.

‘I couldn’t believe my eyes and had to look three times to make sure I was seeing what I thought I was seeing. A cow on the roof,’ he said.

The cow eventually managed to find her way back down to her field, breaking a few tiles in the process.

‘She always was one of my most cantankerous beasts, always wanting to do it her way, not mine,’ explained farm owner Dieter Mueller.

‘She would have stayed up there for eternity if she had wanted to. I tried to coax her off when I first saw her but she wouldn’t budge.

‘She had to do things in her own sweet time. And I am left with the bill for replacing the tiles she smashed.’

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