Tag: mhb

Sex Addiction, Porn Addiction and Harvey Weinstein

Harvey Weinstein sexual assault, sex addiction, porn addiction and Harvey Weinstein rape allegations have rocked Hollywood this week. Rose McGowan has accused Harvey Weinstein of rape Gwyneth Paltrow and Angelina Jolie backing up claims of sexual assault and abuse.

Harvey Weinstein denies rape but has also apologised for his behaviour claiming it is a sex addiction that he now plans to get help for…. but is that an excuse that we should readily accept in the more open and honest world?

Sex Addiction and Porn Addiction may be a symptom but it will not be the cause of his actions. All addictions are rooted in a need to hide, cover up or fill a hole that is empty within someone's life and I felt that was worth talking about.

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WhatCulture FIRES YouTube Staff? – WHAT JUST HAPPENED!?

 

WhatCulture have fired Adam Blampied, Adam Pacitti, King Ross, Sam Driver and Jack The Jobber aka The Cultaholic Ventures C5? A press release earlier today announces that What Culture is parting ways with 4 of their high profile on screen talents and a loyal editor. This comes in the wake of Kenny McIntosh leaving last month.

What Culture WWE has seen a huge boost to viewers in the last 2-3 years with Adam Pacitti, Adam Blampied, King Ross and Jack The Jobber all hosting YouTube series on WhatCultureWWE and even being part of the newly launched WCPW. Sadly it seems this is to end today.

Update – It seems that Cultaholic Ventures Limited was set up with Companies House on 6th September. This currently lists Adam Blampied, Adam Pacitti, Sam Driver and Ross Tweddle aka King Ross as Directors.

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TMI Tag with Fit Sid and SPRAY CREAM – YouTube Collab

Fit Sid is a YouTube Fitness & Travel Vlogger! Today we take on the TMI Tag YouTube Collab Video. Sidney's Weight Loss Journey is truly inspiring. Fit Sidney – "I am a Leo, fluent in Swedish, and a gym junkie! I am based in Arizona, but love traveling! I have an adorable Pomeranian named Toastie, 2 siblings, and a very diverse family life."

Go watch me on Sidney's channel! – youtu.be/7T5l23kVH_0

SIDNEY'S DETAILS – ❤ Let's Talk! ✉
Fit Sid Channel – goo.gl/PKQPwS
Snapchat Me! @simplysidneyxo
Fitness Instagram: @fit.sid www.instagram.com/fit.sid/
Regular Instagram: @stalkingsidney www.instagram.com/stalkingsidney

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Pig Bites Off Man’s Penis and Three Fingers, Farmer Then Dies

Pig bites off mans penis! Man dies as pig who rips of the mans penis and 3 fingers. The man was "fighting" with his pig when the pig bit his penis and 3 fingers, the farmer later died in hospital. Pig kills farmer by eating his penis and three fingers. Animal Attack! A farmer has died after a pig bit off his penis and three of his fingers, it has been reported.

Miguel Anaya Pablo, 60, allegedly decided to start fighting with his pig after a drunken night out in his home town of San Lucas Ojitlan in south-western Mexico’s state of Oaxaca. Local media reports that the pig became aggressive after the farmer provoked it, jumping up and knocking him over.

The animal then bit off three of the fingers of Mr Pablo’s right hand and his penis. The farmer was rushed to hospital in the nearby town of Tuxtepec and treated for the bite wounds. But despite their interventions, doctors could not control the bacterial infections caused by the pig’s bites.

Mr Pablo eventually died some time after the attack. An autopsy has been ordered to find out more about the exact circumstances of his death. Forensics tests are also being carried out. No details of the victim’s family situation were reported.

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Naked Boxing on The Naked News Channel – Eila Adams and Isabella Rossini

Naked Boxing with Eila Adams and Isabella Rossini on on The Naked News Channel. From nude yoga, naked yoga, to naked boxing, nude boxing on a nudist beach. Jennifer Scordamaglia naked news host and Eila Adams got naked yoga in the public eye last week and now naked Eila Adams and naked Isabella Rossini get into the sexy foxxy naked boxing action.

Naked TV presenters Eila Adams and Isabella Rossini show off ‘nude boxing’ skills on public beach…as they bid to steal Jenny Scordamaglia’s crown as TV’s most OUTRAGEOUS host. A PAIR of naked news anchors have been showing off their boxing in the buff skills as they spar with Jenny Scordamaglia for the title of raunchiest reporters.

Eila Adams and Isabella Rossini were certainly delivering some on-the-spot raunchy reportage during their Beach Boxing Battle. This battle of the babes featured during the “Flex Appeal” section on the Canadian based Naked News network.

The subscription station bills itself as “the programme with nothing to hide”. And Eila and Isabella make sure that the ethic and standards of the network were strictly adhered to. As bold as brass they squared up to each other starkers and begin delivering some well placed blows.

Their exposure was sure to put them in the ring alongside blonde bombshell Jenny Scordamaglia for rampant exhibitionism. In fact Elia has already featured with Jenny in The Naked Kitchen show on Miami TV.

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Fidget Spinner Butt Plug – Fidget Spinner Anal Sex Toy Etsy

Fidget Spinner Butt Plug on Etsy? GlowFuckYourself on Etsy has infused an anal sex toy butt plug with a ADHD kids toy, the Fidget Spinner to make a Anal Sex Toy Fidget Spinner Butt Plug. This is extra proof that Fidget Spinner porn is a new viral porno trend – Want a fidget spinner? – amzn.to/2sAhCta

If you haven’t been out in the world or on the internet recently, you may not be aware of a little thing called a fidget spinner. Fidget spinners were originally created to help those with ADHD and anxiety. Now they’re a ~trend~. They’re the hot new toy on the playground. They’re being used to make music. There is, naturally, fidget spinner porn.

And now, finally, butts are getting in the fidget spinner action too. Some genius etsy-er has created a fidget spinner butt plug. To be clear, this is not as simple as labeling a fidget spinner as a butt plug and instructing people to put it inside their butts. That would be silly – and there’d be a massive risk of having to go to the hospital and asking a doctor to retrieve a fidget spinner from inside your anus.

Instead, this is a butt plug that appears to be safe and enjoyable for anal play, but with a fidget spinner stuck on the end. The end that doesn’t go inside your butt, but acts as a stopper to prevent your plug from getting lost. Wonderful.

What’s the point of a butt plug with a fidget spinner on the end, you may ask? Frankly, we have no bloody clue. The esty-er responsible for this mess is called GlowFYourself, who also sells delights such as a golden rosary butt plug and a mood ring butt plug.Of the fidget spinner buttplug, GlowFYourself says it’s ‘here to help that a$$ focused’.

‘That’s right help combat ADHD and get stuff done with your very own booty spinning adventure toy,’ they write. Right then. It’s not clear who is supposed to spin the fidget spinner – the wearer of said butt plug or the buddy inserting it – or if the spinner would be able to pick up much speed against the blockade of butt cheeks. We’re also a little skeptical about the idea that a fidget spinner butt plug could help anyone to combat ADHD or distraction.

But hey, at least now we know that should we ever require a fidget spinner butt plug, one exists in the world. And it’s made of butt-friendly stainless steel. We’ve contact GlowFYourself to ask them some serious questions about what they’ve done (and to find out if anyone’s actually bought the fidget spinner model), and will update this story if we hear back.

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Using Nokia 3310 as a DILDO? – Indian Sex Survey Suggests best Vibrator is Nokia 3310

Nokia 3310 dildo? Nokia 3310's are being used a Vibrator Nokia 3310 sex toys. In an Indian sex survey using Nokia 3310 as a dildo has topped the results as the best option of household sex toys. Pillows, Sofas, Beds, Electric Toothbrush used as a sex toy and now the Nokia 3310 Vibrator. (Want a Nokia 3310 for fun? – amzn.to/2srjHo6)

Nokia 3310s were the greatest phones ever. They were just the right size. They had ever-lasting batteries. They had a vigorous vibration.It’s because of all those incredible features, they’re now apparently serving an alternative use: as dildos.

According to a tiny study of 100 Indian women by sex-positive group, Agents of Ishq, women are using their Nokia phones as a substitute for hard-to-find sex toys. And obviously, it’s doing the rounds on the internet because we all want to believe that those nostalgic bits of technology gold are getting people off.

‘The old Nokia vibrating phone made several appearances on this survey!’ the group says. ‘We have no idea why the company is not the market leader after this!’ One woman surveyed told the collective: ‘A group of three of us decided to masturbate with the old Nokia phones to show a fourth how pleasurable masturbation can be.

‘We switched off the lights to reduce her discomfort and got into our beds. Only, when we switched on vibration, the screens lit up showing off our vaginas!’ What happened to the phones isn’t clear as they’re not waterproof – unlike today’s iPhone 7, which is undoubtedly a far more sophisticated tool.

The survey also claims that 54% of the women surveyed said they used domestic appliances to masturbate with. That included vegetables, toothbrushes and bottles (sort of standard fodder), as well as beds (what?), pillows (how?) and sofas (WTF?). Dependable dildos are apparently quite difficult to get hold of in India but if anyone knows how you can jerk off using a pillow, then please let us know.

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Fidget Spinner Porn – Sexy Porno Fidget Spinner PornHub Search Explosion

Fidget spinner porn searches surge on PornHub as sexy porno videos of AdHD Fidget Spinners become the hottest new fetish. Fidget Spinner Rule 34, x rated fidget spinner tricks adult action became a favourite with Porn Hub users in May seeing a 383% rise in searches for erotic fidget spinner videos. Want a fidget spinner? – amzn.to/2sAhCta 

Any trend can be made in porn – no matter how lame or SFW. So it shouldn’t come as a massive surprise to discover that fidget spinner porn is a thing. New data from Pornhub has revealed that there’s been a massive surge in interest in fidget porn in recent weeks.

In fact, searches for ‘fidget spinner’ have been up 282% on average, with the site receiving 2.5 million searches for videos involving the toy over a 10-day period from the start of May. That is quarter of a million people searching for fidget spinner porn a day. And a huge percentage of those searches has been coming from 18-24-year-olds, with women being 19% more likely to search for it than guys.

But if you want to get your juices flowing, then you might have to work a bit to find the explicit material you’re after because Pornhub’s got a mixture of videos on offer out to troll all you fidgeters.

The 1000mph fidget spinner ‘d*cking down a chick’ is just a spinner fight. We know, we looked. Some, like Dank Fidget Spinner on Hot Ass, are pretty NSFW. In fact, they’re exactly what they say on the tin. But the website has also been uploading a load of videos just showing actual fidget spinners…spinning.

We may, however, have reached our fidget peak on 21 May as searches are starting to decline (whether that’s because Pornhub is disrupting the process with their non-porny videos or not, no one knows).

But the point is, nothing is beyond being made into porn. Nothing (rule 34 of the internet, we salute you).

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Cow Born With Human Face Worshipped As A God – Lord Vishnu Cow

Cow born with human face worshipped as a god. Cow Calf born with a human head could be an avatar of Lord Vishnu? Calf born with ‘human facial features’ is being worshipped as a Hindu God. Baby cow with human face is God Cow in India.

The baby cow was born with eyes, nose and ears that resembled a human which led people to declare it an avatar of Hindu god Lord Vishnu – with plans under way to build a temple in its honour. This extraordinary footage shows a cow born with human-like facial features which villagers flocked to worship as a Hindu god.

The calf was delivered in an animal shelter in India with eyes, nose and ears that resemble a human but died within an hour of its birth. As news of the cow's features spread, locals from surrounding villages flocked to Muzaffarnagar, Uttar Pradesh, northern India in the belief it was an avatar of Lord Vishnu.

Video shows people offering flower garlands and bowing before the animal, which has been kept in a glass box since its death, to seek its blessing.
Villagers believe the calf is the ‘Gokaran’ – 24 incarnations of Lord Vishnu and plans are now afoot to build a temple for him.

Mahesh Kathuria, 50, a local businessman who came to see the calf, said: "God has taken birth from the body of a local cow. "We came here to seek his blessings. Religiously, it is an avatar of Vishnu. We believe it’s a similar character mentioned in Bhagavata Puran, a Hindu religious text."

Raja Bhaiya Mishra, 55, the manager of the cow shelter, said: "It’s a miracle that the calf was born in this shelter. "Thousands of people have been here to see it. We will be cremating him in three days and a temple will be built for him.

"This avatar has most definitely created a devotion feeling amongst the people." He added that the mother was rescued from a butcher and was brought to the shelter six months ago before she fell pregnant. However, animal health experts have a different view on its birth and rubbishes any superstitions surrounding it.

Dr Ajay Deshmukh, senior veterinary doctor, at Wildlife SOS, in India, said: "This is a case of an anatomical anomaly. "If a gene didn’t develop properly or there was a fault, it causes multiple structural deformities, and such anomalies happen."

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Woman photographs 100 penises – Inspirational Dick Pics – Manhood – The Bare Reality

100 Penis Photoshoot – Woman Photographs 100 penises for a truly inspiring reason. Laura Dodsworth, Author of Manhood – The Bare Reality (Amazon – amzn.to/2seBLE6) erotic photoshoot goes into the importance of the penis in her new book. Talking penis size, penis shape, the anxiety and body confidence of men.

Around half of the world's population has one. The human race needs them to carry on. Some unsavoury characters sadly send pictures of them to unwitting victims. Stop it, guys. Yes, we're talking about penises. Long, short, thick, thin – they're wonderfully eclectic in size and shape, colour, and performance. They are variable.

Penises are also a cause of worry to some owners. Beyond our aesthetic curiosity is a tool that some might think is too small, perhaps a little wonky. And that's why, to many, the subject of the shaft is worth exploring.
Author Laura Dodsworth explores – in far greater and more intelligent detail – the importance of the penis in her new book, The Bare Reality . In it, she looks at the concept of masculinity, using the penis as a springboard from which to do so.

Dodsworth previously spent two years taking pictures of women's breasts. This time, she wanted to try penises. The aim of the work is to listen to men's stories, flesh out their inner-most thoughts. And it appears that men are far more open and candid when vulnerable. "I found myself feeling creatively and emotionally out of balance as the project drew to a close," Dodsworth told Metro . "I felt really comfortable with what womanhood meant for me, but realised I needed to hear men’s stories too – to understand manhood."

Dodsworth approached various groups to find men willing to let her shoot their penis. And apparently the photography process wasn't as awkward as you might imagine. The emphasis was on comfort. There was no pressure. Men were also given anonymity. But Dodsworth added that some men "were [still] very nervous". Others were more bold. One thing was attached to them all: the fact they revealed more by revealing themselves.

"I think it felt quite emotional for a few men," the author said. "Some were about to bare cancer scars, or suffered from a sense of shame about their body. Some were relaxed. Some were proud." Dodsworth admitted that she felt a little embarrassed in the first few photoshoots, but that was soon vanquished. In the end, she learned a lot.

Dodsworth said: "Men feel pressure about body image, in similar ways to women, albeit a bit less so. I had no idea how many men carry around anxiety and insecurity about the size of their penis, or some aspect of their performance.

"Because penises are more taboo men don’t see a big variety of real ones around."

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Naked Screaming Feminists – 100+ Feminists In Nude Screaming Femicide Protest in Argentina

Screaming Naked Feminists nude protest in Argentina. 120+ Naked Feminists strip nude in front of government building and scream to raise awareness about Femicide, Domestic Abuse. Naked Feminist protest.

Naked feminists stage screaming protest for violence against women. More than 100 women stripped naked and performed a screaming protest about violence against women in Argentina. They gathered outside the president’s palace, Casa Rosada, in Buenos Aires.The women performing the Femicide is Genocide protest stood in a group and undressed in front of onlookers before screaming en masse.

They were members of the Artistic Force of Communicative Shock (FACC) performing a dramatisation as a prelude to the next march of the feminist collective NiUnaMenos (Not One Fewer) to be held on Saturday, 3rd June in Argentina. In all, 120 women undressed completely in the Plaza de Mayo and in front of the Palace of Courts.

The group used the attention-grabbing tactic to demand greater protection for the victims of gender-based violence, which is on the rise in Argentina. According to official figures, so far this year femicide has been committed on average once every 25 hours in Argentina. On social networks, the hashtag ‘FemicidioEsGenocidio’ quickly went viral, showing hundreds of photos and videos of the protest.

‘We represent them all… and we will always exist,’ tweeted protester ‘Claudia Acuna’. She added later, describing emotional scenes at the protest: ‘Older ladies crying because in their time they could not speak aloud of it, men shocked by the cruelty of these times. I’ll take that.’

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Sexy VR FaceTime Cam Girls Are Here – Sex Chat Web Cams Are Dead

VR Cam Girls, Sexy virtual reality facetime cam girls are here to kill the adult web cam technology. Sikis SaucyTime sexy VR sex cam girls in the porn industry are pushing the boundaries of VR Porn in the adult entertainment with facetime livestreams. SaucyTime offers beautiful ladies, hot ladies in 3D VR 360 Virtual Reality Facetime erotica, VR sex over your smartphone for pocket change.

SaucyTime specialise in mobile phone adult entertainment. Erotica delivered to your smartphone via FaceTime with beautiful sexy webcam girls. SaucyTime offers VR 360 3D access to their VR Camgirls. VR Porn is the next jump in the online porno world. Its like phone sex but with VR cam girls you can play have have VR sex with SaucyTime VR models.

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SaucyTime has been offering FaceTime with sexy ladies since the launch of the iPad2 when FaceTime became available. Technology moves a great deal quicker than content and so where Skype is more used to speak you Gran or relatives, FaceTime is something you use for mates so there’s a level of intimacy there. Also, webcam requires a laptops or PC and laptops are shared, who wants to wait until everyone has gone out to get freaky. This was your can slip off for an ‘important call’ at work, in the back of a taxi, or at a hotel. Everyone carries their phone around with them so with just a few clicks you can have FaceTime with some of the UK’s top glamour models, wherever you are.

SaucyTime VR Facetime are the first company to launch VR telecalling in 3D. 360 is like being in inside a globe looking out 180 3D is like being in front of the person. The cameras are very expensive to manufacture and we are small company but hopefully w will be able to add one new model a month initially and ramp that up once it becomes more popular. You have to see it to believe it though, its such a game changer. PC webcam is slowly dying off and being replaced with mobile and VR, The adult industry has been responsible for so many innovations – online payment processing, video streaming well before YouTube = came along, instant messaging and was a big driver behind broadband..

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17 Hay Fever Life Hacks – Hayfever Cure to Help Fight Your Allergies

Hay Fever Life Hacks to fight your Hay Fever Allergy.

Hay Fever Tips, I have had a bad hayfever allergy for years new. Allergy advice, hay fever cures, hayfever life hacks help me fight hay fever when the allergy season starts. Hayfever allergies can make life miserable, hay fever sneezing, itchy eyes and runny noses we all need hayfever cures, hay fever tips, hay fever tricks and allergy life hacks.

HAY FEVER & ALLERGY CURES SHOPPING LIST – amzn.to/2r3NjHL

1)     Take a daily, non-sedating anti-histamine tablet. A range are available from chemists – find the one that works best for you (which may not be the same as the one that works for your best friend!)

2)     Use a steroid nasal spray. These work by preventing inflammation in the nasal passages, but they take several days to take effect – so be patient. They also need to be used regularly, every day, during the hayfever season – and that includes cool rainy days when the pollen count is low.

3)     Anti-inflammatory eye drops can help reduce streaming, itchy eyes. They normally need to be used at least twice a day. All these medications are available directly from chemists, but larger quantities are much cheaper on prescription from your GP.

4)     Track the pollen count! Watch the weather in the mornings and evenings for the following day to see if its low, medium or HIGH and plan accordingly.

5)     The pollen count is at its highest early in the morning and in the evening – so at these times try to stay indoors and keep windows closed.

6)     Pollen can stick to your clothing and your hair. Give your outdoors clothes a good shake before you come indoors, and wash your hair regularly.

7)     Rubbing petroleum jelly at the entrance to your nostrils can help to trap pollen. If you find it greasy, or don't like the smell, alternatives based on beeswax are available.

8)     Sunglasses can help to protect eyes from pollen as well as harmful U-V rays. Wrap around styles are best for hay-fever sufferers.

9)     On hot, dry days, keep windows closed and check your car's air conditioning is fitted with a pollen filter.

10) Steroid tablets taken by mouth can help reduce hayfever symptoms, but side effects mean they are only suitable for those with severe symptoms. However, they can be very useful to get you through a short period of important exams.

11) Pinpoint Your Allergy. The first step in controlling hay fever is to find out what you are allergic to. Maybe you know, from years of hay fever symptoms, that it's tree or grass pollen in the spring, or ragweed in the fall. If you aren't sure, see your physician to help diagnose your allergy.

12) Learn when to hide! Stay Indoors On Bad Pollen/Mold Days. When pollen counts are high, people with severe hay fever symptoms should stay indoors—especially between 5 and 10 in the morning, when pollens are most prevalent. If possible, use an air conditioner, and keep the filters clean to avoid blowing allergens around.

13) PETS! Avoid contact with pets that have been outdoors—they can carry pollen inside. Keep pets out of the bedroom and off of furniture, since they may carry pollen if they have been outdoors.

14) If You Do Go Outdoors, Shower After. If you have hay fever triggered by outdoor allergens, it's important to shower and wash your hair after spending time outside when the pollen count is high—especially before going to bed. Showering helps remove pollen from your skin and hair and can help prevent a night-time allergy attack.

15) Avoid Smoke and Other Irritants. Smoking—as well as second-hand smoke and smoky environments—insect sprays, fresh paint, and other household chemicals can worsen symptoms of hay fever for many people. If you have allergies, it may be helpful to avoid exposure to these pollutants.

16) Keep In Mind that Most Air Purifiers Aren't Helpful. Studies show that air-purifying units have little effect on allergens. Small air cleaners cannot remove dust and pollen, and some types—called electrostatic precipitators—can pollute indoor air with ozone, aggravating allergy symptoms. The best type is the HEPA (high-efficiency particulate arresting) filter.

17) Ask your GP about immunotherapy. This reduces the reaction of the immune system to pollen, but several months of treatment are required, which should be started in the autumn or early winter.

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Porn Star Attacked By Shark – CamSoda Shark Attack Porno

CamSoda Porn Star attacked by shark! In a shark attack camsoda model Molly Cavalli was bitten by a shark during a porno swimsuit photoshoot. Shark attack porn star Molly Cavalli has yet to confirm if the camsoda shark attack was fake or real. Shark attack, bitten by shark, camsoda girl attacked by shark, shark attacks pron star, shark bites porn star.

A porn star was reportedly left needing 20 stitches after a CamSoda shark attack where she was savaged by a shark during an underwater shoot.

CamSoda shark attack, Molly Cavalli was inside a shark cage filming a video for a porn company when she was bitten on the ankle. The star, who was wearing nothing but a white swimsuit, then emerges from the water screaming and crying before being pulled back onto a boat.

A camera filming the incident caught the moment the water turned blood red after the attack.

According to Camsoda, who were running the shoot, Cavalli was attacked by a lemon shark – although they are not usually thought to be a large threat to humans. In the film, Molly is seen crying into the arms of a crew member while others tend to the cut on her foot.

The lengthy gash allegedly needed 20 stitches. Speaking out on her Instagram account after the attack, Molly said she was ‘totally fine’.

She said: ‘Thanks for your well wishes guys.

‘I’m totally fine. It’s not as bad as it seems. I’m healing quickly. It was still an amazing experience.’Since being uploaded to YouTube, the clip has been viewed more than 91,000 times.

The clip has split reaction, with some people claiming that the video is a publicity stunt, and others stating she was ‘brave’.

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30 Music Festival Life Hacks 2017 – Festival Tips Survival Guide

Music Festival Tips, Music Festival Life Hacks! Download Festival is looming and Music Festival season is about to start, time for some Festival Life Hacks, Music Festival Survival Guides and Step-by-step Music Festival Help Guides packed with Tricks and Tips. Download Music Festival Tricks, Reading Music Festival Tips, Leeds Music Festival Hacks, Glastonbury, Isle Of White and many many other Music Festivals! – as seen on EDM.com

Music Festival Life Hacks – Heading down to a festival this year? Then you’ll need to be prepared. Here are some of the best hacks – all tried and tested and they could possibly save your summer. 

1. TAKE A BIGGER TENT THAN YOU’LL NEED
Always add a “person” to the size tent you’re taking to your festival. If there’s two of you, get a three-man tent. Why? Because you need to have all your rucksacks, clothes, food and other junk in there with you, which takes up a person’s worth of space.
 
2. DON’T PACK A PILLOW, PACK A PILLOW CASE!
You’ll struggle to fit a pillow into your rucksack, so why bother? You’ll have plenty of clothes with you anyway, so simply stuff the empty pillow case with a nice jumper and Bob’s your uncle.
 
3. WRAP SOME GAFFER TAPE AROUND A WATER BOTTLE
You don’t need to pack a whole roll of the stuff, just enough in case of an unexpected rip/tear/deflation/tent pole snap. A space-saver and a very possible life-saver in an emergency. Photo: ShamelessTraveller.com

4. TAKE A CRAP PHONE – Music Festival Life Hacks
Your iPhone 6 may be great, but chances are it will run out of battery at some point, and charging it will be difficult, so don't rely on it too much. Also, if you drop it down the long drop, you’ll never see it again. So dig out an old phone if you still have one, or buy a cheap one that does the bare minimum: call and text. If you need to browse online while you’re at the festival, you’re doing it wrong.
 
5. INVEST IN A PHONE CHARGER
You don’t want to spend the majority of your weekend queuing with ten thousand people to recharge your dead phone, so why not avoid the fuss? USB battery chargers are now affordable – the higher the milliampere-hours (mAh), the quicker the pack will recharge your device. Or, more expensive are solar power chargers, which won’t run out as long as you can recharge them with sunlight. In a real emergency, wind-up USB chargers are cheap and cheerful. 
 
6. EAT ONE SOLID MEAL A DAY
Raving all day and raving all night takes up a lot of energy, so make sure you eat properly. Ensure you have a substantial dinner with carbs in it before heading out for an all-nighter to keep on ’til dawn. Also, take some cereal bars – they're a cheap breakfast, no milk required… And it saves you paying a tenner for a bacon roll.

7. STASH SOME DRY CLOTHES IF YOU CAN
If you drive and you’re taking a car to the festival, leave a spare pair of jeans and socks in the car, so when you leave after four days of torrential downpour, you'll be warm and snug.
 
8. GET MINIMAL WITH YOUR TOILETRIES
Anything you pack makes for extra weight to be carried or dragged from your house to the festival site, so travelling smartly can be a boon. Don’t take a whole bar of soap, shave off some slivers with a kitchen grater for a “one-wash” wonder. Don’t take a whole tube of toothpaste, squeeze some blobs onto a plate, let them dry over a couple of days and chuck them into a waterproof bag. Photo: Pinterest

9. PACK A MALLET
The amount of times we’ve turned up at a festival and had to try and push our tent pegs into the hard, unforgiving stony ground. You can get a rubber mallet for a few quid at any camping store, or how about this dinky plastic one that allows you to pull the pegs out of the ground with ease, too? 
 
10. SEALABLE SANDWICH BAGS WILL SAVE YOUR STUFF – Music Festival Life Hacks
Put your phone, money and other valuables inside and seal! A life-saver if the festival you’re at turns into a monsoon on day one. Photo: eBay 
 
11. INVEST IN WATER AND BANANAS
One morning you will be worse the wear from alcohol, so you need a cure. You’ll need to re-hydrate (hence the water) and potassium is vital for proper nerve function (hence the bananas). Plus, those bananas will help with the low blood sugar you’ll experience from too much alcohol.
 
12. KEEP A LAYER OF CLOTHING IN RESERVE
No matter how cold you are, there's always potential for it to get colder. An extra hoodie or jumper might bring you relief as you stand and watch the Rinky Dink Bike at 4am in the morning.
 
13. BE A CLEVER CAMPER
Try and get on site as early as you can. The earlier you are, the better spot you can bag. Don’t fret if you arrive later, though – just be prepared to walk further to your campsite. Don’t camp at the bottom of a hill (you can imagine what happens when the rain starts to fall), and be careful you don’t camp too near the Gabba Revival All-Nighter Tent if you want to get some kip. Make sure you don’t pitch downwind of the toilets BUT don’t camp too far away from the lavs in case of an emergency.

14. KNOW YOUR PLACE
Remember where you’ve pitched your tent and its relation to the festival site. Find a decent landmark: a path, a toilet block, a group of gurning lunatics, anything that will be familiar to you when you’re staggering back to your crib at a million o’clock in the morning. Putting a England/Scotland/Wales flag on top of your tent won’t cut it – EVERYONE does that.
 
15. HIDE SOME MONEY IN YOUR PHONE CASE
There are ATMs on site, but queuing for them is a huge waste of your weekend. Don’t assume every stall will take contactless payments! Take what you money you will need, but beware of spending cash on crap – do you really need to buy that sombrero? Wouldn’t food be a better purchase? And don’t keep all your money in the same place, just in case you lose your wallet/bumbag. As an emergency, stash a couple of notes underneath your phone case, (or in the battery case if you have a cheap one).
 
16. PLAN YOUR POCKETS
Keep your essential items in the same pockets, so despite how drunk you get you’ll always remember where your phone or wallet is. And don’t put your phone in your top or back pocket – because you will inevitably lean over and drop it straight into the long drop.
 
17. WET WIPES ARE YOUR BATHROOM NOW
Forget trying to have a proper wash or queuing for a shower, stock up on LOTS of wet wipes and freshen yourself up that way.
 
18. KNOW YOUR TOILETS
The festival toilet is a tricky beast to negotiate, but do not fear it. The long drops may be your idea of hell, but being out in the fresh air, with several feet between you and the pit of human filth is often preferable to being enclosed in a hot and steaming portable toilet. Avoid the toilets near the main stage areas and thoroughfares – they’ll be battered from thousands of people using them and will be RANK. A good tip is to spot which loos have just been cleaned and use them before they go “on the turn”.
 
19. MIND THOSE STINGY HANDS
Contact lens wearer? Always wash your hands before putting your lenses in, because it's more than likely your hands will be covered in anti-bacterial handwash and it'll sting like hell. Dip your fingers in the saline solution you’ve just taken your lenses out of for pain-free eyeballs.
 
20. DON’T WEAR A ONESIE 
It may be utterly chic, but you may have to unbutton it in a portable toilet cubicle in the dark, and nobody wants that. Photo: Amazon
 
21. CREATE YOUR OWN MEETING POINT
If you lose your friends and can’t contact them, work out a way of being spotted from a distance. Get a tent pole or piece of garden cane and tie a flag or distinctive inflatable to the top of it. You’ll soon be spotted by your friends and other people will start using you as a reference point! Option 2 for nighttime use: get a whistle and concoct your own personal “signal”.
 
22. HEAD TORCHES ARE YOUR FRIEND
Because you can pretend you're Orbital in the dance tent and you'll be able to spot those pesky guy ropes on the way back to your tent in a pitch black field. Photo: Amazon
 
23. CREATE YOUR OWN “QUIET SPACE”
Your energy will flag if you don’t get any sleep, so invest in some ear plugs and an eye mask to keep out the noise and the daylight if you’ve had a big night.
 
24. MAKE YOUR OWN SUPER LANTERN – Music Festival Life Hacks
Light up your camping space by strapping a regular head lamp to a large milk or water bottle – hey presto, glowing goodness.
 
25. NACHOS MAKE GREAT KINDLING FOR A CAMPFIRE
It’s true. Any nacho will do, look this guy will show you how.
 
26. REMEMBER THE PINCER MOVEMENT
Use the pincer movement to get nearer to the front of the crowd – go in via the side, it saves you having to barge past 100,000 people, most of whom are probably taller than you. And don’t bother pushing your way to the very front barrier – the sound quality is worse, you’ll have less space to do your thing and will find it’s almost impossible to leave.
 
27. DON’T GO MUD SURFING
You may get your photo in the papers, but you'll be caked in dry shit for days. And it'll get everywhere. Everywhere, we tells yer!

 
28. LEAVE EARLY… OR LEAVE LATE
Make sure you plan your getaway – either pack up and get off the site in the early hours before the masses wake up, or take your time on the Monday and wait for the crowds to thin out. If you go between 7am and 9am, you’ll inevitably get stuck in a bottleneck trying to get through the exit gates.

 
29. YOU WILL MAKE LOTS OF FRIENDS IN THE CAR PARK ON MONDAY…
…if you have a pair of jump leads on you.
 
30. THIS ONE SIMPLE RULE WILL SAVE YOU ANY GRIEF:
Don’t take anything you’re not prepare to lose or damage in some way

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