Month: November 2014

Words You Should Never Use On The Internet

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Words You Should Never Use On The Internet

It was my Birthday last week so very kindly my friend’s TookItHomeToJenny and the MoveClubStrikesBack Team made me a little bible of swear words to learn and use as I am such an innocent soul.

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Original Video – Pretty Ladies Send Me Spunk and Teach Me Swear Words – www.youtube.com/watch?v=HhTWpX9hTQI&list=PLkr-iiDw_ZbwtDnFqbtIhHrpxcy8t5YWM&index=2

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Lady Sweets From Denmark | International Spunk #FoodPorn

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Original Video – Pretty Ladies Send Me Spunk and Teach Me Swear Words – www.youtube.com/watch?v=HhTWpX9hTQI&list=PLkr-iiDw_ZbwtDnFqbtIhHrpxcy8t5YWM&index=2

It was my Birthday last week so very kindly MetteMedicine sent me a lovely letter and a loads of sweeties that I just had to read and nibble on camera.

Mette – www.youtube.com/MetteMedicine

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Pretty Ladies Send Me Spunk and Teach Me Swear Words

Pretty Ladies Send Me Spunk & Teach Me Swear Words

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It was my Birthday last week so very kindly my friends TookItHomeToJenny, MetteMedicine and MovieClubStrikesBack send me a few gift and I just had to make a video…. or 3.

MetteMedicine sent me a lovely letter and a loads of sweeties that I just had to read and nibble on camera.

While TookItHomeToJenny and the MoveClubStrikesBack Team made me a little bible of swear words to learn and use as I am such an innocent soul.

Jenny – www.youtube.com/tookithometojenny
Mette – www.youtube.com/MetteMedicine
MCSB MovieClubStrikesBack – www.youtube.com/MovieClubStrikesBack

No no no! If you have clicked on this video expecting Girl On Girl, Double End Lesbian Action, Money Shots or SPUNK then you are only semi right! Shame on you…. this is not hardcore xxx animal porn and I am shocked you would even think that hehe

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Breaking Bad is Back? | Students Expelled For Snorting Sweets

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Students suspended from school for snorting Smarties

A group of parents have been left outraged after their children were suspended from school for snorting sweets.

The three children, from Marshall Middle School in New Mexico, were suspended after allegedly inhaling ground-up Smarties, a form of confectionery commonly known in the UK as Fizzers.

In a letter written to the parents, the school has said that the suspension is the result of the children’s ‘possession of drugs’, despite the fact that they are not known to possess any narcotic qualities.

Kelly Cook, the mother of suspended pupil Andrew Stonelake, has said that she was shocked at the decision, and that her son had simply crushed the sweets into a powder that he could then blow at his friends, describing his behaviour as ‘horseplay’.

She added that her son and his friends had not received any prior warnings about using the sweets while at school.

The three pupils will be forced to attend a school hearing into the event next week, in order to ascertain the events surrounding their suspension.

While it might be a slight overreaction, it’s worth noting that the last time we heard about drugs being linked to a New Mexico school, a certain Walter White was involved.

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Student Sheep Shagging For Exam Stress Relief | Animal Sex Stress Relief

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Student who ‘had sex with sheep’ was ‘stressed about exams’

A university student who is alleged to have had sex with a sheep told police he was stressed out about a midterm exam.

The 23-year-old is alleged to have been found having sex with a ewe by a fellow Fresno State University student who heard bizarre noises coming from a barn on campus.

And the unidentified student, who was arrested and charged with sexual assault of an animal, told police that he was stressed about an upcoming exam and had been drinking, according to ABC7.

‘It’s just kind of disgusting and revolting and personally makes me angry. I mean, why would you do that?’ said Marisa Burkdoll, a student who works with animals on campus.

‘It’s just kind of sick. It’s unnatural and the animals they can’t really, I mean they can’t defend themselves. They can to an extent but they’re innocent, you know what I mean?’

The sheep – one of many used for breeding at the school – is being treated by vets.

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9 Things That Dont Exist Any More

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9 Things That Dont Exist Any More

Ever feel while growing up, and getting old that as you grow up things start to disappear?

For me its a mix of many things like tv shows such as gamesmaster, the crystal maze, gladiators and musical genius’s such as Bob The Builder and Mr Bobby!

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FREE Lifetime Supply Of Bacon for SEX? #FoodPorn

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‘Lifetime supply of bacon’ advertised on Gumtree… mmmm bacon

A lot of interesting things are advertised on Gumtree – from an entire flat of furniture to in-home yoga lessons.

However, this person has listed a product priceless in the eyes of many a meat eater.

They have offered a lifetime supply of bacon. The seller claims it’s free. But nothing in this world is ever free.

Here is the full description from the Hampshire-based vendor of pork:

‘I have a lifetime supply of bacon, I’m desperate to get rid because I need to shed a few piggies.

‘I know it says it’s free however I would like something in return. 😉 (The wink gives it away).’

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Natalie Portman Sex Dolls & Asian Hookers | Hairy Birthday List

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It is my birthday soon and every year for my birthday I am asked to write a birthday and christmas wish list for my family to pick from.. The only issue is that my birthday is in November so most of the year if ive needed it ive gone out and got it for myself.

With that said I cant hand my mum a wish list for Asian Hookers, Natalie Portman sex dolls and a Dominatrix….

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£712 Hula Hoop | Weird eBay Miracle

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The world’s longest Hula Hoop costs the world’s poorest decision maker £712 – £712 Hula Hoop | Weird eBay Miracle

A man showed great restraint when he opted to put an enormous Hula Hoop on eBay instead of eating it.

The move paid dividends, because someone who is either extremely rich or extremely foolish purchased it for £712.

Musician Stuart Hampton, 31, from Darnhill in Greater Manchester, promises to sell the crisp to the next highest bidder if the winner doesn’t pay up.

Either way, he hopes to put the money toward setting up his commune.

Speaking to the Manchester Evening News, Hampton said: ‘I was walking down the street just cracking up laughing about it but if I do get the money it is definitely going towards my commune.

‘The venture is known as the Freeriver Community. According to the website, it ‘is a space that will hold a spiritual and peaceful intention. It will be very free in nature with no set ideas.’

As for the lucky bidder, who’ll knows if they’ll renege on the payment?

They have to wonder: Is losing £712 on a crisp as bad as a poor buyer rating on eBay?

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10 Stress Busting Tips | Stress Relief Survival Guide

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10 Stress Busting Tips | Stress Relief Survival Guide

Stress is a horrible thing and stress can be very bad for your health. I tend to find that my life can be very stressful most of the time with work stress, life stress but thankfully not exam stress now that I am an adult.

However adult life comes with many stressful problems and with that in mind I wanted to share some stress busting, stress relieving stress relief techniques that I have tried and tested over the years.

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Breast Milk Robbery | Topless Woman in Boob Milk Armed Robbery

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Lactating Woman Used Her Breast Milk To Rob A Pharmacy – Breast Milk Robbery | Boob Milk Armed Robbery

An unidentified woman in Germany used her lactating breasts as part of a scheme to steal money from a pharmacy’s cash register. Police in Darmstadt said that the woman approached the cash register, exposing her breasts while pretending to buy a breast pump and squirted milk at the cashier. She used the squirt attack as a distraction to reach into the cash register, grab a handful of money and run out of the store. She continued to squirt anyone in her path as she ran past another counter and attempted to take money from another cash register before leaving the store.

We assume it was like the lobby scene from The Matrix, only with way more breast milk.

There are serious concerns about the availability of weapons especially for those who wish to use them for nefarious purposes. It’s got a lot of people up in arms (no pun intended) because they are considered sacrosanct as a Constitutional right. Well, imagine the uproar that would ensue now that we know that women’s breasts can be used as a weapon and no, that’s not the beginning of a pick up line.

Police believe that she intended to use her squirting ta-tas as a distraction and she could face theft or even robbery charges if she’s captured. If one of the clerks was lactose intolerant, she might even get an assault charge. At least we could only hope.

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Lesbian Porn Star Epiphany to Reborn Again Christian Mother | Porn Again Christian

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Porn Again Christian: Evangelical wife was a lesbian porn star who slept with 100 women – Lesbian Porn Star Epiphany to Reborn Again Christian Mother | Porn Again Christian

Teresa Carey says she turned her back on the X-rated industry after having an religious epiphany while listening to The Beatles

A born-again Christian has revealed how she was once a lesbian porn star who slept with more than 100 women. But just five years ago the evangelical Christian, from Gedling in Nottinghamshire, was making her living in X-rated movies.

Between 1998 and 2009, the 36-year-old slept with more than 100 women on camera and appeared naked in adult magazines including Playboy, Penthouse and Hustler.

Teresa’s entry into the world of glamour modelling began innocently enough with a few head shots for local photographers. But it wasn’t long before offers of work started rolling in and she was signed by a top London agency.

She said: “It started really just taking your top off. That was really nerve-racking at first, but obviously it progressed until that was normal, then it was ‘would you do nude?’

“And going from topless to nude wasn’t such a big step as going from clothed to topless, so it moved from that, to standing next to a girl, to hugging a girl, to kissing a girl, then all of a sudden it’s no longer stills, it’s video.

“I just found myself doing it. It wasn’t something where I thought ‘Oh, I want to be a pornstar’, I don’t think that’s the dream of any little girl.

“At the heart of every woman is a need to be adored, desired, that’s why we like to look pretty, we like to be looked at, we like to be told we’re beautiful.

“That kind of lifestyle, you get that fix, that’s kind of the allure, but while that’s going on, there’s deeper things creeping up on you.”

Her porn work required her to star in explicit girl-on-girl shoots – despite having no sexual feelings for women.

“I wasn’t really attracted to women,” she said. “The whole sexual thing was not on my radar at all, it was just the way I looked worked well for it.”

“I was completely cynical in that way. When you do it everyday, it’s as normal as going into the cupboard and seeing if there’s any crisps available, it’s that normal.

“You’re doing it day in, day out. It’s never real anyway, as much as girls like to pretend it is because it’s good for business. It was all fake.”

Teresa met husband Scott when she was 17 – and the car salesman claims that six days before their meeting, he had a sixth sense that he would meet the woman he would marry that day.

Teresa was actually seeing someone else at the time – but the couple immediately clicked and Scott was happy to settle down.

But Teresa’s life changed forever after her and Scott experienced a religious epiphany – in which they say they came face-to-face with Jesus while listening to The Beatles’ track ‘Across The Universe’.

The couple had been studying everything from Egyptology and UFOs to Buddhism and the Quran in search of life’s big truths.

Teresa said: “We had been reading the Gospel of John, the fourth gospel, and it was a day like any other.

“I’d finished work, he’d finished uploading some of my pictures to the internet, we were chilling out listening to music, and we had an out of body experience together.”

“We came face-to-face with Jesus, and from that moment on our lives have been changed.”

She added: “I didn’t get any sense of condemnation from [Jesus], that all came from myself and from other people.

“I now realise that being a porn star was not what God wanted me to be doing, but he didn’t condemn me for it.

“It’s was more ‘When you’re ready, you can come with me.’

“It was really a testament to my faith that I thought ‘I’m going to have to cut this out and I have faith that God is going to lead me into something better’.”

Teresa now regards porn, homosexuality, and pre-marital sex as “symptoms of the spiritual state the world is in”.

And despite her on-screen success, she says she was always wary of the trappings surrounding the porn industry.

Teresa deleted all her porn industry contacts in 2009 in order to devote herself exclusively to the Lord – including her money-spinning website.

She added: “People say ‘her career was gone, it’s very convenient how she’s had this epiphany’ – but that’s not true.

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